On Wednesday we celebrate our fourth wedding anniversary and although it may seem not much, let me rephrase it:
When Alex and I met, we were both divorced and happily single. I was actually quite critical about “all men” and thanks to Alex’s patience I changed my mind.
The other day a friend, who is about to get married, asked us about marriage and whether it changes things in comparison to “just dating.”
“The greatest marriages are built on teamwork. Mutual respect, a healthy dose of admiration, and a never-ending portion of love and grace.”
I think it does. It’s a social contract – you no longer act in front of the law as separate individuals but as one. For us, it made sense since we believe in the institution of marriage. On the other hand, marriage is not for everyone, it’s not compulsory, and one should know very well if he/ she wants to enter into it.
Our marriage works because we talk A LOT. When I get angry, Alex pushes me to talk about it and reflect on what I said which is so hard… hard for my ego, which is why I dare to say that marriage is about working on yourself, learning to compromise, letting go and having a common purpose. I see it as a spiritual practice, like having children. It’s raw since you have to open up and let the other in.
Marriage is hard work not because you are supposed to be faithful – that comes naturally when you’re married to the right person. Marriage is about non-judgment, being best-friends, companions, and each other’s cheerleaders. It’s about allowing the other to grow and be fulfilled. I think that marriage IS amazing because it’s like an everyday mindfulness practice.
What do you think about marriage?
#marriage #weddinganniversary #happy