byVanjaJocic couture hat/swiss fashion blog/ blog suisse

 “Don’t compare your insides to someone else’s outsides.”

How often do you find these three words in one sentence: self-care, parents, and importance?

The number one advice that I used to get when I was pregnant, was to rest as much as I could. The second one was that we are not born parents, we become them.

I did not fully comprehend those well-meant words until I became a parent. I realized that as parents, we are programmed to think of our child first. it is natural to forget to take care of yourself. And I don’t know about you but I feel selfish everytime I go for a massage, facial or to a hairdresser. I feel that I should be at home with my daughter which is not rational as she is having a great time with my husband.

One of the mistakes, that I made, was looking for inspiration on Instagram. Not only what I wanted to know what to wear postpartum, I kept comparing myself to other moms as well. Which, as I know now, is completely unproductive. They all looked happy and perfect. Some of them slimmed down to their pre-pregnancy weight within the first two months. They all made it seem like a piece of cake. Being a new mom should be fun, simple and easy. And they did it all with full makeup and perfectly synchronized selfies.

My version of “life as a new mom” was sore and messy. I felt helpless, lost and confused. Something had to be wrong with me because everyone else seemed to be passing with flying colors. I wish someone had told me that it was OK and completely normal. That no one has their s*** together after giving birth (unless you have an army of nannies, personal trainer, cook and house help on your hand).

Then one day, which seemed really hard and dark, I stumbled upon a quote:

DON’T COMPARE YOUR INSIDES TO OTHER PEOPLE’S OUTSIDES.

Soon after, a friend who listened to my ranting, said that there is a reason why they instruct you on a plane to put on your oxygen mask before you assist your child.

It was a parable to the importance of self-care. Because if you don’t take care of yourself, one fine day, you will end up feeling tired and empty. And if you have nothing to give, you can’t cater to your child’s needs.

On the other hand, if you flourish and thrive, your children and your family will as well.

So don’t listen to your inner doubts and judgments. Don’t compare yourself to others. Once you become a parent, not only that you have to justify your choices to yourself, you’ll get into disagreements with your partner, parents, and in-laws as well.

Everyone has something to say. And the hardest thing is to listen without taking it personally. Keep your mind and heart open. And be aware that they all mean well.

the importance of self care/ JCrew
importance of self-care/Oversized Moss green pants
currently wearing/oversized green pants

Top: J.Crew, Pants: J.Crew , Hat: by Vanja Jocic, Heels: River Island (similar), Handwoven bag: from Kenya.

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PHOTOS BY: Alex

wide leg green pants/swiss fashion blog

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30 comments

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I love this post. Such an eye-opener for parents!

Jessica | notjessfashion.com

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Self-care is so important. I love that quote. This is such a great outfit. Love the pants!

Amy Ann
Straight A Style

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Hi. I just found your blog but love it and I will join your linkup too. =) Love this statement Fall look. The pants and bag are fabulous!

Would love for you to join my new linkup this week. A new Thursday Moda linkup goes live every Thursday!

http://eleganceandmommyhood.blogspot.com/2017/10/thursday-moda-84-fall-mustard-cardigans.html

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Hi Ada, thank you for joining. I will definitely link up on Thursday! XO

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Adore this cute look! Great post

Tiff
http://www.dashoffashandfinance.com

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I’m not a mother yet but I enjoyed reading this! I relate to it on other levels though, thanks. And I love this look!

-L.
LenaRevealed.com

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Thank you, Lena. Hugs

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Those pants are really cute!

Sincerely Miss Ash

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Thank you, Ash. XO

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Your pants look so comfortable, I love the tie at the waist
xo
http://www.laurajaneatelier.com

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i love this pants!
are beautiful <3
have a good day darling.
kisses

amoriosdelamoda.blogspot.com

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Very nice post! I am not a parent, but to 2 shih tzus, but feel it is important to take care! i love your paper bag waist pants, the style and color are so flattering!
jess xx
http://www.elegantlydressedandstylish.com

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Ohh, I love shih tzus! They are so adorable. I used to have Lhasa Apso when I was small.;-))have a great day and thank you for stopping by, Jessica

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This is such a good post Miri!! I compare myself to people all the time and I need to stop. I love that quote! I think it’s going to be my new mantra!

Jennifer
Effortlessly Sophisticated

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Hehe, I am happy you like it. It is my favorite quote! Big hugs, sweetie

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I love your outfit! Those pants are so cute and I am sure comfortable. The bag is just the perfect accessory and I am sure functional!
Love your photos, the setting is really pretty.
Peace!
Cheryl
https://www.northwestmountainliving.com

Reply

Thank you, Cheryl! Have a wonderful rest of the day;-)

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This is so true Miri! But it’s hard not to compare!!
XOXO
Jodie
http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

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I know, it is hard…but the truth is, we never know how others are really doing behind their beautiful facades. Big hugs!

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Thanks for this inspiring post! Taking care of ourselves is so important. Love this chic look and dying over those green trousers. Thanks for the link up!

http://www.kathrineeldridge.com

Reply

Thank you, Kathrine. XO

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I loved this post and all you said! Even if I’m not a mother, I can relate it to myself in a certain way. Thank you for sharing!

http://violettedaily.com

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Thank you, Violette! XO

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Don’t we all feel “not good enough” at some point in motherhood? I know I did a lot! But everything was fine and the worry was worthless! Now I pass tips of mothering to my children for the grandchildren! I must also say how beautiful you look this week xx
http://www.vanityandmestyle.com

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Thank you for your lovely words, Laurie! Hugs

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Very true and what a lovely read, thanks for sharing this and your gorgeous outfit. x Jacqui
http://www.mummabstylish.com

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Thank you, Jacqui. XO

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You look stunning Miri❤️
Nistha
https://www.fashionistha.com/my-denim-story-with-cover-story/

Reply

Thank you, Nistha. XO

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