How can we inspire our daughters?
Since our daughter was born, I gained a new sense of responsibility. I am afraid that one day, she will look into my eyes and say that she does not want to be like me when she is my age. I said that to my mom so many times, especially as a teenager. I believe that parenting is a lot about inspiring and encouraging our children. When my sister and I were growing up, my mom never said that we were great, that we were enough or that we were the best. At that time, they believed that you would spoil your children. My mom grew up in a communist country which had a huge effect on her perception of self-love and the way she expressed it. I understand where she was coming from but I believe that healthy amount of self-assurance, self-love and self-respect is necessary.
I don’t want that my daughter grows up to be a “nice girl”. Polite, kind and respectful yes, but not a “nice girl”. Nice girls sit in a corner and wait for their knight in a shining armor. Nice girls don’t take pride in their achievements. Nice girls want to be loved by everyone. I don’t have to tell you how unrealistic their life is.
My husband always says that you should lead by example. And that’s what parenting is about. We all want better future for your children, but we keep repeating mistakes of our parents. That is why I will tell my daughter every day that I love her. That she is enough the way she is. That she is special. That I will always be there for her.
A friend shared with me a beautiful video of Dr. Shefali Tsabari, author of The Conscious Parent: Transforming Ourselves, Empowering Our Children and The Awakened Family. According to her, if you are your most empowered, authentic self, your daughter will be inspired by that:
“When women live enslaved by their culture, their spouse, their job, their fears, whatever it may be, they teach their daughters that they are not enough and that to find joy, they too will have to be dependent on other people and things in their lives.
By continuing to seek approval from others instead of looking inward and living in self-confidence and acceptance, we perpetuate the chains placed on women throughout the world. In order to set our daughters free and start a new era of self-love and fully embodied freedom, we must lead by example.”
Chloe-Sofia: Petit-Bateau body.
Photos by Alexander Ramp